DIY History | Transcribe | Iowa Women’s Lives: Letters and Diaries | Eve Drewelowe autobiographical writing, 1980s

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Eve Drewelowe autobiographical writing, 1980s

Front

<printed on page, upside down:>
The Regents of the University of Colorado extend their wishes for a joyful holiday season and a most pleasant and happy 1988
Charles M. Abernathy, Jr
Richard J. Bernick
Robert E. Caldwell
Peter C. Dietze
Lynn J. Ellins
Hugh C. Fowler
Sandy F. Kruemer
Norwood L. Robb
Roy H. Shore

<handwritten:>
[Burn?] in conflict- unhappy no privace
[Had?] I have been deprived have deprived myself.

Privacy raped despoiled

There lurks this feeling to
[illegible] had been shy couldn't [illegible] support my [decisions?]  "that my [mom?] didn't know she had me. She of course- was aware she had something but I question she knew it was I-
If she had know I was sure she could not have declared "Eve is ill [illegible]
She points too much
I [deem?] differently and I have a [more true?] knowledge
I was ill as it turns out according to medical analysis- that

my contention - I didn't paint enoug - loaded but was put heavily too In plain language I am a misfit - Trying to adapt my life has been a mistake - - - It all Too much energy req for adapting me to others Been grounded - Lived with conflict - push around puppeted - no life of my own - no soul I can call my own - - Whims z capsules of others -- I abuse my artist who values her Went to get into this mess --
Now the years have left me in no position to help myself
And believe it or not- years are unkind devastating - a mixture of chaff vinegar and gall. Demands stolen my privacy and yeast -- What should be joy has turned to desperation - Acknowledge it or not the yrs have ground me down.

It was thes [illegible]

Saving...

The Regents of the University of Colorado extend their wishes for a joyful holiday season and a most pleasant and happy 1988 Charles M. Abernathy, Jr Richard J. Bernick Robert E. Caldwell Peter C. Dietze Lynn J. Ellins Hugh C. Fowler Sandy F. Kruemer Norwood L. Robb Roy H. Shore [Burn?] in conflict- unhappy no privace [Had?] I have been deprived have deprived myself. Privacy raped despoiled There lurks this feeling to [illegible] had been shy couldn't [illegible] support my [decisions?] "that my [mom?] didn't know she had me. She of course- was aware she had something but I question she knew it was I- If she had know I was sure she could not have declared "Eve is ill [illegible] She points too much I [deem?] differently and I have a [more true?] knowledge I was ill as it turns out according to medical analysis- that my contention - I didn't paint enoug - loaded but was put heavily too In plain language I am a misfit - Trying to adapt my life has been a mistake - - - It all Too much energy req for adapting me to others Been grounded - Lived with conflict - push around puppeted - no life of my own - no soul I can call my own - - Whims z capsules of others -- I abuse my artist who values her Went to get into this mess -- Now the years have left me in no position to help myself And believe it or not- years are unkind devastating - a mixture of chaff vinegar and gall. Demands stolen my privacy and yeast -- What should be joy has turned to desperation - Acknowledge it or not the yrs have ground me down. It was thes [illegible]